Home ReviewsBDSM Gear 16 Best BDSM Collars of 2023: Who Can Resist Collared Bdsm Sex?

16 Best BDSM Collars of 2023: Who Can Resist Collared Bdsm Sex?

by Jane Louis
Best BDSM Collars

Whether you like playing a submissive role, a dominant role, or switching between the two, the best BDSM collars can add a tastefully intense and ultra-satisfying element to your BDSM play.

BDSM collars come in many shapes, sizes, styles, and specific features. You can find shock BDSM collars, locking BDSM collars, leather BDSM collars, discreet BDSM collars, and more.

Given all the options available, people interested in experimenting with BDSM collars may quickly feel overwhelmed.

Thus, in this article, I'll walk you through the 16 of the best BDSM collars so you can choose the perfect one to fit your sexual preferences, unique kinks, and deepest desires.

What are BDSM Collars? (& why they can be sexy and exciting?)

A BDSM collar is a collar used during sex- and pleasure-oriented play that is worn around a person's neck to represent and exacerbate that person's submissive or "slave" role in the experience.

In other words, a collar is considered a BDSM collar when it is meant to be worn during BDSM, which is an umbrella abbreviation for bondage and discipline, dominance and submission, and sadism and masochism.

This is why the partner wearing a collar is usually considered the "sub," short for submissive, as they are the ones who will be "bonded."

This person may also receive "discipline" or may have some level of pain inflicted on them - all depending on the agreed role play and boundaries set before the experience begins.

Keep in mind that this submissive status does not indicate that the person has no real control.

Like every BDSM activity, full consent of all parties is still required, and that person is free to stop the act or release themselves from this form of bondage whenever they wish.

Also, keep in mind that the "dom," or dominant role, can wear a collar as well. It's all up to the fantasy the participants are looking to play out.

However, the symbolism of a collar adds excitement to a sexual experience because it takes the sub/dom roleplay up a notch, making the roles feel more authentic and intense.

Many people get turned on by either feeling in control (dominant role) or lacking all power (submissive role).

A BDSM collar helps play up both of these desires by serving as a tangible representation of both party's fantasies.

Given that there are many ways to use BDSM collars, it's fortunate that there are many different types of collars to choose from and collar representations in the BDSM community, including but not limited to:

BDSM collar types

Collar of consideration

A collar that is worn when considering the sub/dom relationship is used as a stepping stone and appropriate for newer relationships

Submissive training collar

A simple intro collar, usually made of leather, is worn by a less experienced user. It's the next step after a collar of consideration, thus confirming the sub/dom roles.

Protection collar

A protection collar represents that the sub, who is wearing it, has an "owner," which protects them from the "rule" of other dominants.

Day collar

A day collar, otherwise known as a discreet collar, is an item that goes around the neck that can pass as a standard necklace or fashionable choker to other viewers, thus can be discreetly worn in public. However, the partner(s) involved know what the collar represents.

Permanent collar

A permanent collar is similar to a wedding ring, as it's meant to represent a long-term commitment to the sub/dom relationship established.

Locking collar

A locking BDSM collar is a collar that locks. These types of collars may be used for permanent collars, or they may simply be used for more intense play.

Play collar

A play collar is a casual collar that is typically only worn during a kinky roleplay or during a sexual experience. Many of the collars on this list are play collars.

Leash collar

A leash collar is a collar with a leash attached, granting more physical power and control to the dom who may get off by walking their sub around or tugging their neck. 

Nipple clip collar

A nipple clip collar, or a nipple clamp collar, has attachments that allow a dom to simultaneously bond the sub's neck and clamp their nipples, thus adding a bit of sadism.

Shock collar

A shock BDSM collar can also add an element of sadism to the kinky play, as it enables the dom to shock the sub whenever they wish, typically through a remote control mechanism.

Different ways to use bdsm collars

image credit: Stockroom

16 Best BDSM Collars 

Now that you're aware of the wide variety when it comes to BDSM collars, I'll list the 16 best BDSM collars that you can purchase as soon as you're ready to start experimenting.

1. Qiui Little Devil Electric Collar: Best Shock BDSM Collar

Little Devil Electric Shock Collar

The Qiui Little Devil is a uniquely designed electric shock collar that is both daring and cute, just as it appears.

The shock function works through a phone's Bluetooth, allowing someone to shock their partner at a moment's notice.

It may sound a bit dangerous and even unethical at first to shock your partner as a form of BDSM punishment, but this collar uses safety pulse voltage technology to ensure an appropriate level of pain (and pleasure) without consequences to the skin or body.

Though, I'd still recommend this particular type of BDSM collar for people more experienced with BDSM play and who have a greater level of trust in their dom partner.

Allowing someone to put a collar on you is one step, but the shocking mechanism definitely takes things up a notch, hence why it can be so thrilling!

Electric Shock Collar app

Additionally, you don't have to worry about extended play, as the battery life lasts up to five hours on a full charge.

And last but certainly not least, this shock collar is unique in that it offers "Stand Still" and "All Fours" modes for advanced sub/dom agreements.

In these cases, the collar automatically delivers a shock if the sub moves or if the sub stands, respectively.

Pros

  • Bluetooth-operated for easy and quick control
  • Safety pulse voltage technology
  • Long battery life of five hours
  • Stand Still and All Fours modes for advanced play
  • Comfortable and well-fitting
  • Thrilling and exciting for many users

Con

  • Not appropriate for those new to BDSM
  • No D-rings or O-rings for additional restraints
  • Some parts of the control app is not in English

2. Dominix Deluxe Heavy Leather: Best Leather BDSM Collar

dominix deluxe heavy leather collar

Leather BDSM collars tend to be heavier, sturdier, and more comfortable than other types of collars, and black leather material is undoubtedly sexy. 

The Dominix Deluxe Heavy Leather collar has an attractive design, as the metal stud detailing makes me feel submissive, powerful, and brutal all at once.

It's wide enough to stop a sub from looking around or dropping their head, which can be a huge turn-on.

However, it is still quite comfortable. It has ten holes in the buckle, allowing it to fit both my and my partner's neck comfortably, and its professional standard leather material is padded for extra comfort.

This collar also has three D-rings that can be used for pulling and tugging when we want to add sadomasochism to the mix.

You can also attach a rope, chain, or leash to a D-ring, allowing for more versatile restraint and dominance overall.

Pros

  • Long-lasting durability
  • Quality leather material and sturdy finish
  • 10-hole buckle for appropriate fit
  • Padding for additional comfort
  • D-rings for added versatility
  • Sexy metal-studded design

Cons

  • Contains nickel, which may cause allergy symptoms for some users
  • Though adjustable, it may still be too wide on the neck for some users

3. Fifty Shades Satin & Lace: Best Satin BDSM Collar

Fifty Shades Satin & Lace

The Fifty Shades Satin & Lace is a gorgeous, well-designed, ultra-sexy BDSM collar.

The beautiful and intricate satin material makes this collar particularly attractive.

Beyond the look, this BDSM collar has nipple clamps for more versatile use, and these clamps have beginner-friendly pinch adjustability and quick-release functions.

For added pain, the dom may gently pull on the chains for a more intense nipple experience; and for more pleasure, the dom may add water-based lube to the nipple clamps before putting them on their sub.

Pros

  • Excellent design and feeling of silk and chains
  • Latex- and phthalate-free
  • Nipple clamps included
  • Clamps are adjustable for greater or weaker pinching
  • Beginner-friendly quick-release function
  • Bow-tie on collar for a perfect fit
  • Budget friendly

Cons

  • Need both hands to tighten the nipple clamps
  • Ball weights on nipple clamps are a bit weak

4. Slave Collar with Thorn: Best Metal Slave Collar for Serious Training

STEEL SLAVE COLLAR WITH THORNS

Some may refer to it as a slave BDSM collar, as not only is it used for submissive play, but it is a heavy-duty collar made of stainless steel and includes four D-rings for attaching additional restraints

The standout aspect of this particular collar is the name tags that come with it.

You can attach one or more of these tags to the sub's collar, adding another layer of submission and ownership.

The name tags include the words "Sissy," "Mistress's Pet," "Cum Slut," and "Slave."

However, if you're uncomfortable with the term "slave collar" due to historical or modern slavery, there is no need to call it such yourself.

Just like everything about sex, sexuality, and pleasure - it's all about your preference and what personally turns you on.

This collar is built to last and can withstand years of play, including the roughest play.

However, I do not like the feel of a metal BDSM collar on my neck as much as material like leather or satin.

Pros

  • Durable stainless steel material
  • Printed sub name tags
  • Four D-rings for attachments and versatility

Cons

  • Metal may be too uncomfortable for some users
  • Slave symbolism may offend some users

5. Tall Curved Posture Collar: Best Locking BDSM Collar

Tall Curved Posture Collar

Not only does the Tall Curved Posture Collar prevent the sub from bending their neck or slouching while it's on, but it also can prevent them from taking it off due to the locking buckle.

The locking feature adds a spicy element to BDSM play because it heightens the intensity and realism of the sub/dom fantasy.

Because it is curved, the wearer is still able to move their chin and mouth a bit, which I prefer for being able to still perform oral comfortably.

The material is a thick, non-creasing leather that can withstand the test of time, and there is a D-ring on the front side for leash or other attachments.

Pros

  • Locking buckle for high-intensity play
  • Curved for slight chin flexibility
  • Tall neck for posture-focused kinks
  • Three sizes for the best possible fit
  • One D-ring included
  • Ideal for posture training

Cons

  • 4" length may be too tall for people with shorter necks
  • May take long to ship

6. Sex Mischief: Best Discreet BDSM Collar

Sex Mischief everyday collar

The Sex Mischief collar is a faux leather BDSM collar that does not necessarily come off as a BDSM collar to the average observer.

This is why it's a perfect collar for discreet, everyday wear.

I like wearing it knowing that my partner and I know exactly why its own, but also avoiding questions and stares I would get from a more boldly designed or thicker BDSM collar.

It has a velvety soft material that allows me to wear it all day long without irritation or discomfort, and the velcro fastening system makes it easy to adjust if need be.

Additionally, an O-ring on this collar provides the opportunity to attach a leash during play but is small and subtle enough to stay discreet outside of play.

I also like that it is vegan-friendly since it is made with faux leather.

However, if you want a natural leather discreet everyday collar, check out this Luxury Italian Leather Thin Choker instead.

Ultimately, a discreet collar such as this is an excellent collar for both inexperienced subs who want to get used to wearing a collar and experienced subs who just want to play all day long!

Pros

  • Discreet, fashionable look
  • Great for beginners or less experienced collar wearers.
  • Straightforward velcro adjustability
  • Vegan friendly
  • Subtle O-ring for attachments
  • Comfortable for long-time wear

Cons

  • Loosens too easily / too easy to tear off 
  • Material is a bit flimsy and may come creased

7. Heavy Duty Restraint Set: Premium Metal BDSM Restraint Set

HEAVY DUTY RESTRAINT SET GOLD

This unisex Heavy duty BDSM collar set is one of the most intense on the market given its high-quality 304 stainless steel material.

And its secure lock inclusion are suitable for serious BDSM play.

This set include a collar, wrist cuffs and ankle shackles

One thing to note is that the stainless steel material will gradually adjust to your body's temperature, heating up as things in the bedroom heat up along with it.

This is comfortable for many people, as the warm metal can feel soothing around the neck.

Since metal is temperature-sensitive, I like to manipulate the temperature before play.

For example, if I want to inflict a cool sensation on my sub, then I might chill the collar in the freezer beforehand. Or, if I desire it to be hotter, I can place the collar in hot water prior to play.

Keep in mind that it has a specific size for its male and female designs, and it is not adjustable.

Female: 

  • Collar: 4.64 inch / 11.8 cm Diameter 
  • Hand Rings: 1.89 inch x 2.28 inch / 4.8 cm x 5.8 cm 
  • Ankle Cuffs: 2.55 inch x 3.07 inch / 6.5 cm x 7.8 cm

Male: 

  • Collar: 5.43 inch / 13.8 cm Diameter 
  • Hand Rings: 2.16 inch x 2.55 inch / 5.5 cm x 6.5 cm 
  • Ankle Cuffs: 2.95 inch x 3.46 inch / 7.5 cm x 8.8 cm

It is not meant to be either too tight or too loose, so be sure to measure your neck, waist and ankle before purchasing this set.

Also, keep in mind that a lockable model is most appropriate for advanced play.

If you do not feel ready yet for a locked collar but like the idea of a metal one, try this Magnetic Barbell Stainless Steel Collar instead.

You'll get the heavyweight and the look of a locked metal collar without the full commitment.

Pros

  • High-quality stainless steel material with gold coating
  • Includes lock for advanced bondage play
  • Amazing quality and can last for many years
  • Temperature-sensitive for temperature-specific BDSM
  • Ideal for serious and advanced BDSM play
  • Box included for discreet storage

Cons

  • May be too intense for beginner or less experienced play
  • Only one size each for female and male versions

8. Bondage Boutique Faux Snakeskin Restraint Harness: Best Posture Collar for Ultimate Versatility

Bondage Boutique Faux Snakeskin Restraint Harness

Some doms are particular with their commands, which may include wanting their sub to have a tall, standing posture with their head held high, like the previously mentioned Tall Curved Posture Collar.

However, this BDSM collar, the Bondage Boutique Restraint Harness, takes posture play to new heights.

Not only does it wrap around a wearer's neck, but it continues downwards to eventually bind around the waist.

You can also strap it to the wrists for a more intense bondage experience.

The faux snakeskin material has a sexy appearance at every angle, and each restraint is adjustable for a comfortable fit.

Plus, there's a total of nine D-rings among the front and the back, so the opportunities for restraint, restricting, tugging, pulling, and all sorts of BDSM play are endless.

If you are not a fan of animal skin pattern, but still into this type of posture-training design, I suggest to check the Sportsheets restraint - it has the same design, but is made of elegant black leather.

Sportsheets Neck Wrist Restraint

Pros

  • Full harness for sexy look and versatile play
  • Nine D-rings for additional restraints and versatility
  • Attractive red faux snakeskin design
  • Designed for both front and back use
  • Ideal for posture training

Cons

  • Only one color option
  • Lacking holes on the belt for smaller users

9. Breathable Ball Gag Collar: Best Pink BDSM Collar

Breathable Ball Gag Collar

A ball gag is another popular element of BDSM play, and this pink BDSM collar comes with this feature attached to it for double the fun.

It's a cute and cheery pink color, which I personally appreciate. Ball gagging is not my favorite aspect of BDSM play, but this color makes the idea more inviting and fun.

Plus, the ball is very breathable, so I don't feel like I'm actually choking or losing air like other ball gags might make me feel.

With its vegan-friendly faux leather, bright color, and affordable price, this collar is ultimately an excellent option for intermediate BDSM players who want to take things to the next level.

Pros

  • Ball gag feature upgrades standard BDSM play
  • Breathable ball with holes
  • Fun, pink color
  • Three D-rings
  • Affordable price
  • Vegan-friendly faux leather

Cons

  • Pink and red color options are very similar
  • Relatively small ball gag

10. Tailz Puppy Play Set: Best BDSM Dog Collar

Tailz Puppy Play Set with dog collar

Puppy play involved at least one partner, typically the sub during play, acting like a puppy dog.

They must stay in an all-fours position and listen to the commands of their owner, and this type of play can be as serious or as humorous as you and your partner would like it to be.

Regardless of how it's carried out, the Tailz Puppy Play Set provides everything you'd need to get started, including a "dog" collar and a leash.

Also included are a bone gag for the wearer's mouth and a plug tail for the wearer's anus.

The result is a dynamic fantasy carried out with the help of several live items to foster the imagination.

Related Article for animal play: The Best 10 Tailed Butt Plugs: Yea! This Can Be Your Fairy Tail!

Pros

  • Four items for complete puppy play
  • Leashed collar for a realistic role play (Leash is detachable)
  • Phthalate-free silicone material for anal plug and gag
  • High-quality design for long-term use
  • Good value for money

Cons

  • No ears or furry items included
  • Pricier option if you're just looking for a collar

11. Shibari Rope Collar: Best Cute BDSM Collar

Shibari Rope Collar

The Shibari Rope Collar is arguably the most fashion-forward BDSM collar on the market.

You can get it in red for a sultry look or flaxen for a more subtle and cute look.

Either way, it comes with a cute heart-shaped lockbox that heightens the intensity of a sub/dom roleplay while lowering the intimidation factor, especially for less experienced individuals.

This is the best BDSM collars for couples who want to experiment with dom/sub BDSM while adding elements of romance and care.

Made with silk, cotton, and natural hemp, this collar is also solid and durable while appearing significantly more elegant than metal or leather.

Related Article: How to Shibari? The Art of Japanese Rope Bondage

Pros

  • Cute BDSM collar design
  • Non-intimidating heart-shaped lockbox
  • Perfect for couple play, esp. if you are into rope play
  • Durable material
  • Easy to clean

Cons

  • Not ideal for those turned on by hardcore or tough appearances
  • May come off too love-oriented for non-committed partners

12. Master Series Kitty Cat Bell Collar: Best Kitten Collar for BDSM

Master Series Kitty Cat Bell Collar

Kitty play is similar to puppy play in that it typically involves the sub remaining on all fours and acting as the respective animal.

This Master Series Kitty Cat Bell Collar is super cute, fashionable, and subtle.

It can perform well on its own or play an excellent part in a complete kitty costume.

Plus, the bell attached to the collar jingles, which adds to the cutesy appeal.

Unlike the puppy kit that included other puppy-related BDSM items like an anal plug tail, this item only comes with the collar itself.

And if you like rough bondage, this will not be a great choice as there are no D-rings to add a leash or additional restraints.

Pros

  • Beginner-friendly
  • Personality-focused collar
  • Cute & adorable design
  • Bell actually jingles
  • Ideal for light animal play

Cons

  • No rings to add a leash
  • Does not come with other kitty-oriented BDSM items

13. Leather Collar With Spikes: Best BDSM Collar for Men

DOMINIX Deluxe Heavy Leather Collar

image credit: Stockroom

It should go without saying that any gender can play the role of a sub or dom. However, many collars appeal to women or femmes.

However, this Leather Collar with Spikes is the best BDSM collar for men and masculine types, given its spiked, black leather design.

You might look tough wearing this, but as a sub, your dom can still use the O-ring in the front to attach a restraint and keep you in check.

This collar is also excellent for doms who like the idea of commanding their sub to restrain them as well.

Finally, there is a lockable buckle that makes this collar all the more powerful.

Pros

  • Hardcore, masculine design
  • O-ring for attachments
  • Lockable and adjustable buckle
  • High quality leather material

Cons

  • May take longer to ship
  • Intense style for beginners

14. Bondage Boutique Soft Collar and Leash: Best BDSM Training Collar

Bondage Boutique Soft Collar and Leash

The Bondage Boutique Soft Collar is the best BDSM collar for training.

Its soft, padded texture and easy-on, easy-off velcro closure decrease the intensity of experimenting with collar play.

If you've never been restrained by the neck, having metal, rope, or even leather tied to your neck may cause more discomfort, so this collar is a great stepping stone.

It's also quite affordable, so if you try it out and realize that power play is not for you, or at least not with the use of collars, then there's not too much risk involved compared to a $50+ item.

However, if you would like to start with or move on to a leather collar while keeping the velcro closure, try the Bondage Boutique Faux Leather Collar instead.

Pros

  • Great for the price 
  • Sturdy, especially for velcro closure
  • Neck part is very comfortable
  • Beginner-friendly

Cons

  • Length and material of the lead
  • Looks a bit tacky compared to leather version

15. SPARTACUS Mistress COLLAR: Best Collar for a Dom

SPARTACUS Mistress label COLLAR

If you're a dom and are looking to purchase an item to heighten the gravity of your dominance by putting a label on your sub, then look no further.

The Spartacus Mistress Collar does just that by placing a playfully demeaning label right on the front of the leather collar.

If calling your "mistress" doesn't get you going, perhaps because they are not a woman or it simply does not strike your fancy, you can also get the same collar with other words including "bitch," "daddy," "submissive," "slut," and slave."

Also, subs that are turned on by the public display of their submissiveness might get off by wearing this out, such as to a bar or nightclub.

Pros

  • Statement piece
  • Options between different labels
  • Comfortable leather material
  • Stylish design appropriate for a sexy nightclub

Cons

  • No rings for attachments
  • No option for custom BDSM collar label

16. UPKO Bondage Play Kit: Best Luxurious & Romantic Set for Couples

UPKO Bondage Play Kit

This kit has it all and is the perfect gift for your romantic partner.

It has a unique leather thorn collar, a gold chain leash, leather thorn handcuffs, leather thorn whip, and intriguing rose ball gag.

I consider myself more sensual than kinky, and my partner is more kinky than sensual.

This UPKO kit allows both of us to get more of what we want simultaneously, with various textural elements combined with kinky items.

It's super fun overall and perfect for strengthening lovers' sexual, sensual, and erotic connection.

Pros

  • Complete kit with various bondage items
  • Premium quality and gorgeous look
  • Unique romance-centered designs
  • Both kinky and sensual
  • Perfect for couples

Cons

  • Pricier than some of its competitors
  • Ball gag may feel too big for some individuals

How to Use BDSM Collars? & My Experience Shared

As you can gather from the BDSM collars above, there are many types of collars out there, and this reflects the various ways in which you can use them for BDSM play.

As a sub, you can wear them and have your "dom" or your "master" put it on you and play with you as they wish.

They may attach a restraint on your collar, like a leash or a rope, to add elements of sadomasochism, especially if the collar has a D-ring like the Dominix Deluxe Heavy Leather.

A sub may also wear a everyday collar such as the Upko thin choker to discreetly carry out their submissive role in their daily lives.

As a dom, opportunities are endless when it comes to using a BDSM collar, only limited by your and your partner's preferences and - of course - boundaries.

Doms can choose a leash that turns them and their sub on the most, be it a highly restrictive posture collar like the Bondage Boutique Faux Snakeskin Restraint Harness, a sexy lace collar like Fifty Shades Satin & Lace, or a risky and thrilling shock collar like the Little Devil.

I like all forms of BDSM collar play, but I especially like the ability to have a dom put a restraint on the collar and tug at my neck at spontaneous moments.

That's why getting ones with a D-ring or an O-ring is an important aspect for me.

how to use bdsm collars

image credit: Stockroom

Whichever type of BDSM collar you choose, the most crucial aspect of this intense and exciting form of kinky play is ensuring consent for all parties involved.

It's also essential to determine a safe word that the sub can use to stop a specific action or entirely end the roleplay if they become too uncomfortable.

Remember - consent, safe words, mutual pleasure, and a high level of trust are what make these power-oriented experiences as desirable as they are.

Related Article: 11 Best Bondage Toys for Ultimate BDSM Play (& How I Enjoyed Them)

How to Clean Leather BDSM Collars?

The best way to clean real leather BDSM collars, as well as other leather restraints and bondage items, is simply by washing them with soap and warm water.

Make sure you are cleaning it regularly to avoid signs of wear and to keep it as shiny and sexy as it first came.

Avoid harsh soaps such as washing detergent, and opt for milder soaps such as baby shampoo.

Where to Buy BDSM Collars? (I’ve shopped at all the places I mentioned below)

There are many places to buy BDSM collars. Instead of local stores, I usually shop online as it's more discreet.

And there usually is a bigger range of options.
If you google “BDSM collars”, you will find many different websites that sell BDSM collars.

Below are my recommendations:

  • Lovehoney: This is my number 1 go-to shop when shopping for sex toys and BDSM gear.
    It offers very good international shipping and there is a big variety, from everyday collars to training collars to leashed collars.
    From time to time, Lovehoney offers very attractive discounts (can be up to 50-70% off). 
  • Shevibe: I recommend this shop to buyers from US and Canada.
    Despite not being very well-known, this place actually has a very complete collar collection from established brands.
    They barely offer big discounts, but it usually sets a lower retail price.
  • If you are looking for hardcore BDSM collars, I suggest checking Stockroom and OXY.
    They both have unique collar collections that you won't really find in other shops. Note that the shipping from Stockroom may take some time as many models are handmade after ordering.
  • If you are tired of kinky-looking designs and want a collar that shows elegance, UPKO is a good option.
    They only have around 10 collars options, but each of them is gorgeous and very well detail-oriented.
    I rarely find their collections in retail stores, so, when the budget allows, I usually shop directly from the official site.

Verdict

Although there are many fantastic, sexy, and versatile BDSM collars out there, Qiui Little Devil Electric Collar and the Upko thin collar remain my faves.

The Little Devil's Bluetooth-operated shocks, along with its "Stand Still" and "On All Fours" modes, ensure that advanced users have as thrilling of a time as can be.

And the discreet Upko choker is super fun to wear out in public, secretly reminding me of my lover and our playful dom/sub agreements.

However, there is no right or wrong when it comes to the best BDSM collars for you. It's all about what gets you hot and turns you on!

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